rivalidad del hermano

I'm an only child. I tell you that for this: most of the time I have no idea how to handle the Boy(s) sibling rivalry. It's voodoo. My go to move is generally to apply my own code to a situation. The problem with that approach though, I'm an adult. The Boy(s) are, well boys. Example. Wyatt is sitting in Ethan's room watching TV. Minding his own business. Ethan, in a bad mood for whatever reason, comes in and turns the TV off because he's annoyed that Wyatt is in his room, and well, he's in a bad mood and he wants to spread the joy. That's not cool. If someone did that to me, I'd tell them to F bomb off, or worse. But it ain't me, It happened to Wy, and he is in Ethan's room. So, what do I do? Be Wy's advocate. Let the natural pecking order happen? That's a rhetorical question. No need to email me. That's the kind of stuff that just baffles me. I actually cited Ethan in my example, truth be told, Wy is much more the instigator. Being smaller I guess, he likes to mess with E's mind. Example. Ethan is notoriously up tight about his stuff. Catalogs it. Has it in bags and boxes, all sorts of strange places. Sleeps with it. Curious. Very curious. Wy knowing this, will get close to an area of stuff and even touch it (not take it mind you, but touch it.) Ethan freaks out and then retaliates against Wy. Again, Wy started it? He knew his brother would freak. That's why he did it in the first place. What do you do?

These sort of situations are non-stop at our Casa. The end result is usually one of the Boy(s) ends up crying at which point me or my Lovely Bride get involved and have to deliver some sort of justice. It's tough, and as I said earlier, especially for me because of the only child thing.

All of that was typed to get to this...The other day, MLB is gone. Wyatt is watching The Incredibles in Ethan's room. Ethan leaves the front room, and me, to go to his room. Two minutes later, Wyatt erupts in a howling cry that sounds like he is genuinely hurt, vs. a fake cry, or mad cry. I jump from my throne of impotence, annoyed to be honest, to investigate, bum rushing into the room. Living up to the idiot that I am, I demand of Ethan, "What happened." Ethan stares at me with a mean smile, incriminating himself. Wy continues to howl. I fetch a plug and a blanket and pick him up for some comforting. Since he's still crying after the plug/blanket/pick-up he's been hurt hurt. Still I 'm not sure what happened. There are no marks? Again, I ask Ethan, "What happened to your brother." Again, Ethan gives me that smirky grin that leads me to believe he has done something to Wy. I decide to change my tack. "What did you do your Brother?" Nothing. Not counting to ten and getting mad myself, I again, demand, "What did you do to your Brother. You'd better tell me, NOW."

I'm an idiot. I mean, let's think about what I'm asking a 3 1/2 year old. Even if he did get the moral, right and wrong aspect of what I'm asking (all the instruction manuals say they don't get the moral, black and white thing at this age) is he actually going to step up and incriminate himself by telling me? Especially when I'm clearly pissed, holding his crying brother.

Still, he know he needs to give me something, so he looks at me, working up his I'm trying to get away with something let me work it cute smile, and said, "Dkadfad adfsalfsd iadfadf afdasfsdfd lafdafdadfa adfooadf." I type it like that because it was complete gibberish. Reminded me of some sort of Wy baby babble.

"What?!"

He then repeated himself, nearly exactly.

At this point, I'm more confused than mad. Wondering if he's really telling me something - that I'm not getting - and or if he is simply messing with me.

"What?"
"It's ok Dad." Placated by a 3 1/2 year old.
"What did you say Ethan. What happened to your brother?"
"Dkadfad adfsalfsd iadfadf afdasfsdfd lafdafdadfa adfooadf."
"What?!?! What are you saying?"

He then walked over to me, giving me that big fake I'm so cute you can't be mad at me smile, and gave me a big fake cute sweet leg hug (I'm standing holding his crying brother.) I wasn't buying it. I again, asked, sternly.

"What did you do to your brother Ethan. What are you saying?"

To which he replied (I shit you not.)
"It's spanish."

Until I BLOG again...Voy a azotar el behi del muchacho.