Stepping over the line in the sands of coolness

The Boy(s) got bikes. We had us one of them there garage sales. Actually, it was more a part of the front yard, and some of our drive way sale. Regardless we got a nice chunk of change and rid of a lot of our crap, so we could quickly run out and buy more crap. Like bikes. And protective gear for those bikes. Safety first.

The Elder Boy actually got his protective gear before he purchased his bike. He was so enamored by this kick-ass helmet he saw at Toys 'R Sucks that my Lovely Bride bought it for him on the spot. If you saw it, you'd understand. It is cool. Metallic blue. Flames. I'd wear it.

The Younger Boy also was enamored by a certain helmet he saw at Wal-Mart. A Dora The Explorer helmet. My Lovely Bride swears that this Dora helmet is not gender specific. I don't believe her. It is a girl helmet. Worse, it has matching knee and elbow pads.

Not that the Little Warrior minds. He loves that helmet. And pads. So much so, he'll often wear them around the house. To school. On errands. Mind you, he's not riding his bike around the house, or to school, or on errands. Nope. He's just into the bike gear.

I actually got to go out Mother's Day shopping this past Saturday with the Boy(s) and have disgruntled phone store employees smirk at me because Wy was suited up in Dora head gear and pads. It probably didn't help that the Boy(s) got into a knock down fight in the store when I was trying to pay for our purchase. The helmet actually came in handy then, Wyatt can lower it like a battering ram. Still, it is a bit curious to have the Boy all suited up in this stuff. He wore the knee pads so much (they are tight) that he developed some weird creeping crud type rash.

Probably the oddest thing though, is that he wants to sleep in the helmet. With it on his head. I'm pretty sure that all the instruction manuals would not recommend this, so we compromise with the Boy and let him sleep with the helmet in his bed, but not on his head. You know, like most kids sleep with a blanket or a teddy bear.

So, the other day, I come home and find my sweet Wy Wy perched in my throne of impotence watching Bear (what he calls the Little Bear cartoon on Noggin.) As I bent over to give him a kiss, I noted he was sitting next to his helmet. This is normal. What was not, was the fact that there was something crammed inside of the helmet. You know, the part where you would put your head if you were actually wearing the helmet. Looking closer I realized that what was inside the helmet, well it was underwear. Seriously. More specifically, Thomas the Tank Engine underwear. The Boy is starting the potty training process, and he feels Big Boy underwear are cool. Still, it is a lot easier to watch Bear in a diaper, that way, well you don't have those bothersome bathroom breaks. So what do you do? You cram your cool Big Boy underwear into your favorite helmet and all hunker down and watch Bear. Nice.

Giving Boy #2 a big hello kiss, I thought to myself, at least he hasn't crammed Dora underwear into his helmet.

Looking up at me, Wy gave me his typical, "Hi Da!" greeting.
"Hello Wy Wy," I said, "How are you today?"

To which he replied, "That's MY bike."
Indeed.

Until I BLOG again...Hey, That's my bike!