Slow down, you move too fast.
You got to make the morning last.



Simon and Garfunkel sang that one...when they were feeling groovy (read: stoned.) It is a nice thought for a Boy Named Stu, Father of Ethan and Wyatt, Husband of Carter. I have the hurry sickness something fierce, and fight it daily. I took S&G's advice on Friday. No, I didn't get STONED, I took a personal day off from work to spend with the family. Doing nothing. Hanging. Three day weekend. Go me! Nothing on the agenda other than spending time with Team Tinsley. I must say, it was quite nice. Boy #2 hit the 2 month mark on Saturday, and we celebrated by heading to Strollerbriar (a.k.a. Stonebriar) Mall. Just me and the Boys (and the beast stroller.) It went surprisingly smooth. Boy #1 rode the carousel. Dug it the most. Then had two cookies. Then hit the play area and ran amok. Sugar high. Had fun though. Boy #2 slept in the beast's belly (stroller) most of the time. I was a poster Dad for political correctness as we strolled up and down the mall - even hitting the 'family' lounge and bathroom where I fed Boy #2. I was amazed at how many looks I got at the mall (so many that I checked to make sure my fly was zipped, looked in a mirror to make sure Carter had not written "Dork" in sharpie on my massive forehead while I slept.) I guess a Dad sans a female at the Mall alone w/ two young children is not the norm? All the other Mom's would check me out when I walked by - give me a nice, encouraging, smile. A few nods, and one awe how sweet when I was feeding Boy #2 in the 'family' lounge. The best one though, was while I was on line at Starbucks (the boy had his sugar buzz, I needed my caffeine one.) A Mommy approached me and the Beast. She had the same Beast, albeit an older model. Her Beast lacked the back child tray thingy (where you can put cheerios, and other whatnot for the kiddies), it just had a bar. She asked, if I thought she could buy our type of tray as an attachment. I thought at first this was a rhetorical question (my social skills having suffered after being with two small children for such a long period), but I quickly recovered, and told her, I had no idea. I briefly considered selling our tray thingy for some 'fun' money, but quickly nixed that idea, figuring if one Mommy would get so jazzed about a tray thingy on the Beast, our Mommy (as in Carter) would feel the same way. I'd probably be in for a royal ass chewing if I sold it. So, I just looked at the Mommy, and let the conversation hang in silence...which brings us back to S&G -

Hello darkness, my old friend,
I�ve come to talk with you again,
Because a vision softly creeping,
Left it�s seeds while I was sleeping,
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence.

Until I BLOG again. Bye.

New Cousin Alert. Boy #1 and Boy #2 have a new cousin in the world. Uncle Chew and Aunt Jeannie had a 9 pound boy they named - Carter Thomas Kincaid. Carter, obviously a nod toward the Boys mom, Carter Elizabeth Kincaid - who became a Tinsley when she signed on with me. Baby Carter (for clarification sake) came into the world on Tuesday afternoon, a few days past his due date. Good for him...no hurry sickness. In fact, the Boy was born on Mardis Gras (a.k.a. Fat Tuesday.)

Good news. We are an honest Team of Tinsleys. Carter went back to The Picture Place (scroll down friends, and read, to catch up to now) and paid for the photos we lifted on Sunday. Go Team.

Today is Mardis Gras. To illustrate how much your life changes when you have Kids, I don't offer up any stories of drunken excess at fake New Orleans joints in the Stressoplex, or girls gone wild tricks for beads. Oh, no. At our Casa, Mardis Gras is celebrated as such: Dig Boy #1 - and please, enjoy your Fat Tuesday. Until next time. Bye.

On Sunday, Team Tinsley ventured to Valley View (not in the bucolic sense - in the mall sense - The Messedupplex doesn't have a lot of geographic beauty but makes up for it x2 with shopping and restaurant) en masse. The reason. Pictures. We wanted to freeze time, capturing Boy #1 and Boy #2 together - at their respective 2 year and 2 month marks.

So, off we went complete with our new double wide stroller. That thing is a beast. My first outing with it. I think you need a heavy machine operators license to stroll that damn thing. Put it this way, it will barely fit in the mall elevator. You have to turn it sideways. You need one of those annoying beep beep beep (like on Garbage Trucks) warning alarm things when you're backing up to turn around. I nearly took out a table at the Food Court. Not pretty. But as always I digress.

Pictures. The The Picture Place. Or is it Picture People. Can't remember. Kid friendly joint. You can put your little ones in all sorts of strange poses with props galore. I had the sicko thought while waiting for our studio if they would shoot an adult in the nude. If you came in there with the cash. Not a nice thought considering I'm in a kiddie photo place. I told Carter this thought and she agreed that I am in fact Sick. After nearly a 20 minute wait, while some kid hopped around me and Boy #1 like he was Nighcrawler from X2 (he had seen the movie - the kid that is, as well as X-Men 1, I told him he reminded me of Nightcrawler and he took no offense, you got to love an 8 year olds mind) they called Team Tinsley, come on down.

Ansel Adams was off that day, or dead, is Ansel Adams dead? Someone let me know. Regardless we had Matt as our Picture Place or People photographer. Take away Matt's sideburns and under the lip fuzz and Matt could have passed for a kid in Ethan's Mommy Day out class. Maybe not. Let's say a kid with a gland problem. THE POINT. Matt was young. Probably making minimum wage to take my precious photos. Which is fine on one hand, but then for what the places charge and factoring in the time we had been there and would be there - well I'd rather have more professional photographer shooting my precious memories. Not Matt who probably was getting high on his break and then going to the Food Court and eating thrice fried pork from China Love Restaurant. I digress again. Sorry.

So, we suited up the Boys in striped tops, jean bottoms and attempted to get Ethan to hold Wyatt on the white seamless background. Ethan wasn't playing that game and refused. He was more interested in Matt's props in the back of the studio. Next, we tried to get Ethan to hold or sit next to Wyatt on a bean bag. This was somewhat successful although it appears Wyatt is likkered up and passed out - head leaning on Ethan who has a crazed fake smile - kind of scared look that was produced by Matt waving around this feather duster thingy that in inteded to get kids laughing and smiling? I bet the Picture Place or People have training manuals and classes devoted on how to operate the feather dusty thingy to get smiles. They probably have a training video on this.

After Ethan was done, we split to get a gum ball and to ride the duck (and kiddy ride at the mall.) We missed Wyatt's shoot. Carter was in charge of that. We met up later at the Food Court where Boy #1 was eating a HH Meal. Fast forward.. to 2pm - time to get our prints and the Place - the Picture Place or People Place is BUSY. People are everywhere, looking at their prints and trying to decide which cute/precious pic of their progeny they should purchase. We go thru this exercise (which is like doing advanced math for me - how many prints you need / by the number of grandparents - wallet prints = annoyed Stubie) and then wait to pay. And wait. Wait. Wait. After nearly 30 minutes Carter is getting sticky fingers and wants to split. Boy #1 is ready for nap time and none the happy about waiting around this joint. Plus the Nightcrawler Kid is back and hopping around again. He's fun when you are running around with him. But when its nap time, well Nightcrawler is just annoying. SO - Cart, decision somewhat shaped by Ethan's wanting to go HOME - and the whole nape time thing - says we're leaving! Which we did, with the pictures. Yes, Team Tinsley are now Thieves!!!!

The sad part is The Picture Place or People probably have no clue that they we stole prints. That's how disorganized a train wreck the place was when we were trying to pay them. Not that their disorganization justifies are thievery.

SO - the burning question is this: Will Carter go back this week when they are less busy and pay for the prints (we already paid for the sitting fee?) OR will she not pay? Cast your vote - and please dear reader STAY TUNED!!!!!

On a totally unrelated note. I had Boy #2 duty last night. While I was doing the Daddy Dance trying to get him lulled into sleepy time, I was watching Seinfeld. Probably the first time I've watched Seinfeld in over a year. Guess what episode it was? The one where George has (or he thinks he has) a romance going w/ the photomart chick and has Kramer take racy photos of himself. SYNCHRONICTY.

Bye.

Filed under 'getting old.'

I puchased a paper shredder last weekend. Spending $25 buckaroos (I got a model that has a collapsable waste basket for easy storage - and it can shred up to 8 pages at a time) on a shredder. How adult. Why did I feel the need to spend $25 on a shredder? Because I worry. I worry about goofy shit. Identity theft is the boogeyman in this worry story. I purchased a paper shredder because the media has convinced me that there are hundreds of people out there ready to rifle thru my garbage (be forewarned there may be a shitty diaper or two in said garbage) in order to obtain my social security number and or other valuable and confidential info. I'm not sure who I am in the bigger picture, and if that isn't bad enough, someone may be out in the alley going through my garbage trying to steal my identity. POINT PLEASE. The act of buying a paper shredder isn't the 'old' indicator in this story. No. Paper shredder is a sensible purchase, being cautious, blah blah blah. The thing that screams OLD is that I was excited about buying the paper shredder. In fact, the first thing I did when I came home with this purchase was to hook it up and to start shredding confidential medical records that have amassed the past two years (they have my social security number on them.)

To quote a favorite songs...
But now I'm old, hell I'm well past twent-five -
And I can't seem to fall in love no matter how I try.

I've actually managed to fall in love with a nice lady who puts up with the above goofiness. Everyone think a nice thought and beam it esp style to my lovely bride, Carter.

Until next I blog...
Bye.

The Scene. Team Tinsley Casa. Early Sunday AM, February 15. 7am. Wiggles are dancing and singing on the TV. Boy #1 is on the sectional - piping hot chocolate in front of him. A bundle of his blankets on his lap. Mom and Boy #2 are still asleep. Boy #1 has a light bulb go off over his head and jumps up on the sectional and looks out the window into the backyard. In the early AM light he can see a patch or two of snow from the previous days snowfall. Most of the three inches of fluffy fun is long gone. Wet. Drip Drip Drip. Boy #1 turns to me and with those big brown eyes looks up and says:

More snow please.

Thought I'd experiement some more with uploading pics to this BLOG. Dig these images. First one is of Ethan a.k.a. Boy #1. He won't wear just ONE hat. Has to wear multiple hats. This particular day/pic he is wearing three hats. He goes out in public like this - its quite funny. Don't you agree.

Second pic is of the newest Team Tinsley member, Wyatt, a.k.a. Boy #2. Post bathtime, getting dry, ain't he cute. It is amazing how much he looks like Boy #1 at the same age - we'll need to id our pics or we might get them confused - that's how close they look alike. Dang Dog Damn. I'll have to post a pic of Boy #1 at the same age as Boy #2 so others can see...pretty cool.

Finally. A dang funny picture of me - I had a Van Dyke (as my people say - goatee as you'd probably say) and was in the process of shaving it off...but I got a picture of what I'd look like with a mustache, for the heck of it. I look pretty stylin' - don't you think. Pornstar!


Enough messing with this BLOG. I need to get my motor runnin' - head out on the highway (to Las Colinas - that means HILLS in spanish.) Until I BLOG again...

Rainy and cold hump day in the Messoplex. Some sunshine in the form of pics of the Boys. I'm getting the hang of this BLOG thing - and now able to upload Pics to make the whole online diary better. New and improved as we'd say in my shill business. Anyway...Below are a few recent pics of the Boys. The first one is Boy #2 and Boy #1 (left to right) playing on Boy #2's Baby Mat Thing. Forget the technical name for this device. Boy #1 digs it the most, and likes for EVERYONE to get on the mat (he assigns an animal for you to lay on - you can't quite make it out in the picture - but the mat thing has a jungle theme complete with lion, elephant, zebra, monkey, etc.) He calls the lion - Lion King - as he's really into that movie/video recently. He got it for his 2nd BDay. Didn't dig it at first, but it was on regular tv over the weekend and he got hooked.


The next picture is bath time. One of Boy #1's chores is to bathe his little brother. He has to earn his keep. Kidding. Don't call child services on us. Mom is in charge - out of frame - but there.

I had Boy #2 patrol last night. We (me and the wife) switch duty. Night on, Night off - Danielsan - sorry. My head is crammed full of useless pop culture like this Karate Kid reference. Bubbling up. Back to the point. Boy #2 for the first six weeks on the ground, has had awake time from 9pm until 11pm (on a good night), 11pm + ? on a bad night. Last night was a good night. Go me!!! I gave him a bottle at 9:45pm...he wasn't that interested in it - ate 2ozs of a possible 4 for those playing along at home.

Instead, and this is the point of the BLOG, he just squirmed around making the wildest noise. He sounds like a little monster. It is quite funny, and I need to get my lazy ass in gear and record some video/audio of him doing this - for posterity, and for profit. I bet I could burn a CD and sell it to Haunted Houses this October for their spooky soundtrack background thing.

I don't remember Boy #1 doing this. Boy #2 though, well you need to hear it to fully appreciate it. Maybe one day I'll get the Team Tinsley website up and running and figure out how to stream some video/audio so you can hear for youself. Until then, take me word for it. Boy #2 is noisy.

Until I Blog Next Time...
Bye

Monday Monday. Trying to slip into the work week, never an easy proposition. Worked late on Friday night shooting Cantoni TV Spot in the store (B Roll Footage as they say.) Sounds mildly exciting. Boring. Cart got the Boy(s) out to the Mall for a little diversion. Maiden voyage of the new Double Stroller. I think the Double Stroller (DS going forward) truly makes us Breeders. It is a gargantuan (barely fits in the Honda Accords Trunk - yet another reason to get a Mini-Van) device. We now have 2 proper strollers, one cheapo umbrella stroller, and one jogging stroller. Then we have a kid friendly red wagon (holds two kids - you can strap them in - proper seats, the works,) and a Push Car thingy that can replace a stroller. Last time I counted we had 2 Boys. Yet we have 6 strolling type devices - and Carter wants to get a double stroller. We need another garage for all of these things.

In other news...I lost my shit this weekeend trying to fix Mimi's Computer (Mimi being my Mother-In-Law.) I was trying that which cannot be fixed - I literally worked w/ three seperate tech people on the phone (her email isn't working properly if you care) and exausted all threes resources. Houston, we have a problem. Indeed when the tech person tells you - I don't know what you should do, I'm baffled? So after spending a lot of time trying to fix it - with a crying baby in the background (Boy #2) and a crazed toddler (Boy #1), I go to MY computer and its dead in the water. HULK time. I lose it. Reach around to see if it is unplugged (it is) = so plug it in - and then discover that a protective plate on the back of the mac is lose, try to fix it, only for it to come off because its broke. HULK time x2 as I hurl the plastic piece into the dining room wall. Now I have a bitter reminder (an inch gash in the wall) of my fun computer repair weekend. All I can say is - Bad Stubie - BAD! For those playing along at home - stick a pin in your Stubie doll. What a dink. PATIENCE. I need more. MORE!

Until next time.

God bless Suki. Who is Suki? Suki is our cat. Boy #1 loves Suki. Yesterday Carter made a Sam's run, Diapers, wipes, all the fun things you buy when you have little Boy(s) in the house that soil themselves still. Expensive too. But, that's another rant. Anyway - the byproduct of the diaper/wipes run is some fun boxes left over as trash. Boy #1 is into all things TRUCK, and him and his Mom started playing a game called "Garbage" - yesterday was Garbage day for Team Tinsley - so I guess seeing the Garbage Truck runnin' down our Alley on his way to school was the motivation. Such a bright Boy. Anyway - "Garbage" the game had the Boy putting stuff into one box and then putting that box into the other. Laugher - and then repeat the process. All fine and good until I get home. After a Petco run for Dog Dog (black humour aside: we wonder - aloud - each time we buy a big bag of dog food if it will be Dog Dog's last) me and the Boy come back and he wants to play - Garbage. Enter Suki. Minding her own business, just wanting to be fed, she becomes the Garbage and is put into the box (the bigger box - Suki is a fat cat) and the placed into the other box. HILARIOUS laughing ensures and Suki meows and just hangs out for a very long time shut up in a box. The Boy then ups the ante and starts putting plastic plateware (knifes, forks, plates, etc.) from a picnic kit, into the box with Suki. This goes on for sometime. Bath time comes, read books, night night. Cock-A-Doodle Do. Fast forward to today. 7am. Boy is up and the first thing he wants to do - as Suki enters from outside. Garbage. The poor cat is probably still in that damn box.




Other Boy #1 news. He's hooked on the Animal Planet's "America's Funniest Animals" - he will sit there and cackle all through the show. It is pretty funny - but even more so, watching him cracking up over animal high-jinks.

Over and out for now.

Wyatt a.k.a. Boy #2 had his 5 week check up today. The stats for those playing along at home.

FIVE WEEK CHECK-UP
Weight: 11 lbs and 11 ozs - 95 %
Length: 22 3/8 - 75 %
Head: 15"

COMPARED TO HIS 2 WEEK NUMBERS
Weight: 8 lbs 5 ozs - 50 %
Height: 21 1/4 - 75%
Head: 14 1/4"

The Boy is a growing. Everything else checked out hony dory. He has a rash. His foreskin wasn't cut back enough during his circumcision - so Dr. Morchower had to pull it back. Not fun. We had to pull his pud twice daily now - so the foreskin doesn't affix up by the head. But other than that - everything is coolio.

Boy #1 is driving Mom nuts in the back while she is trying to bathe Boy #2.
Dad to the rescue...so Bye.

I've become my father. Not in some Freaky Friday sort of way. In my actions. I walk around my house turning off lights. Closet lights. Bedroom lights. Bathroom lights. They always seem to be on in a part of the house that isn't occupied. I walk around and turn them off - just like my Dad did when I was a young-in living at home. Note to Pop: I 'so' get it. Funny how you don't get most things while you are getting them - I think this thought is summed up best by Norman Maclean in "A River Runs Through It" - great story - and movie adaption too. I think this might be in the movie and not the book actually - for those that are exacting. I paraphrase of course: Norman, you like to write. Yes, I do. Well maybe one day, when you are old, you can write our story. Only then will you understand.

Amen to that.

ANOTHER GREAT QUOTE...
Each one of here today will at one time in our lives look upon a loved one who is in need and ask the same question: We are willing help, but what, if anything, is needed? For it is true we can seldom help those closest to us. Either we don't know what part of ourselves to give or, more often than not, the part we have to give is not wanted. And so it those we live with and should know who elude us. But we can still love them - we can love completely without complete understanding.

Revealing note: This movie makes me tear up - every dang dog time I watch it - just about the time the good Rev. is saying the above quote.

Be Cool.

My deep thought of the day. Why aren't the other Wiggle's worried about Jeff. I'm no Doctor, but his habit of suddenly falling asleep clearly indicates that he's narcoleptic.